Desire planet, I've dreamt of it.
For you, tomorrow, get free access to riches.
Who's got the sense of savings?
Warning: Advertisement is paying. In this movie, it is offered.
It doesn't change the world, but it contributes.
French Petrochemicals Products " Welcome to the brave new world "
Everything can be bought.
Love, Art, planet Earth.
You, me.
Particularly me.
Man is a product like others with a sale deadline.
I'm an ad designer.
I'm part of those who make you dream of things you'll never have.
Sky always blue.
Women never dumpy.
Perfect photoshopped happiness.
You believe I make the world prettier?
Wrong. I screw it up.
Everything is temporary.
Love, Art, planet Earth.
You, me.
Particulary me.
There, it's done.
The page is turned.
I can watch my life back.
It's cool.
For example, I had completly forgotten how much,
at a young age,
I loved sophisticated pictures.
- Arch your back!
show me your butt!
- Octave, honey, Dinner's ready!
- Yes mummy, I'm coming!
I've always been off-set.
I was really made for that job.
- Beat it.
Fuck it's shit!
I'm on a bad trip.
Sorry Stephanie, are you alright?!
I didn't know you were here.
It wasn't on purpose, sorry.
Are you alright? Wait...
I
For me, everything had started so well;
the mood was good, the dj excellent.
Pleasant temperature, superb girls,
alcohol galore, drugs of quality.
Undeniably, my first 33 years were really successful.
But I won't hide the truth.
I'm not a nice guy.
- We're closing
I am a big shit.
A modern hero.
I find my trousers in Vogue Italy
and in Deutsh and Vanity Fair
prior to the month of purchase.
Concerning my shirts, they come from New York, Tokyo, Bombay, Guethary.
I'm sorry to be so ahead of you, but...
I'm the one who decides today what you'll want tomorrow.
I drug you with novelty.
And novelty's advantage is that it doesn't stay new for a while.
You should ideally hate me, before hating the era that created me.
So here it is, my name is Octave, Octave Parengo.
And my dresser is APC.
I have spent my life manipulating you for 75.000 F a month.
When you finally save enough to be able to buy your dream car,
I shall already have made it old-fashioned.
I always manage to frustrate you.
I penetrate your brain.
I come in through your right hemisphere.
Your desire doesn't belong to you anymore.
I impose mine on you.
I'm the most influential jerk in the last 2,000 years.
- Octave Parengo, Room 312.
- I got that for you.
- Thank you...
Sorry,
it's ugly.
Common.
This is Ross; Rosserys and Witchcraft.
A world leader in ads.
Median age: 28 years old.
Sales: 1.430.000 F
My open ended job is a copywriter.
I write 30 second film scenarios
and slogans for posters.
I say "slogan" for you to understand,
but you should know we say
"catchphrase" or "headline"
For example: Wonderbra.
"Look at me in the eyes."
"I said in the eyes!"...
- Ave Octavus!
- Hi, dorks!
...It comes from me.
Arch your back!
Here new territory is explored toward dry sausage.
Stan, he consolidates the "teen shower" spirit and the 15/35 y. o.
Alexandra, she tries to optimize the strategical approach of seniors' napkins.
Funky...
Here is the accounting department.
And she is...
What is her name?
Ohhh, nevermind...
That's Marc Maronnier, my creative director.
After Philippe, the president,
he is the most important man in the company.
- Hi.
- Hi, how are you?
- I just spent the weekend with my man.
Four days in Cabourg.
I'm so happy! - Oh yeah?
- ... A charming little corner
so romantic, we landed up there,
We digged it so much...
It was great, I'm so peachy!
- You're fired, take your stuff right now and beat it!
I am not joking.
Marc is like that. For 10 years he has taught me everything.
Alright, you stay.
And as for your outdated language:
"we digged it, it was awesome, we got a kick out of it"
Avoïd that when I'm immersed in a file.
It disgusts me.
And you spend this weekend here, I want a balance for Tuesday.
- Yes, Mr. Maronnier.
- Ok, it's cool, you can call me Marc.
- He is a genius. - Are you ok?
Are you ready for this afternoon's presentation for Madone?
- Yeah, we have something. - I won't be there.
Jeff will be- - Wait, jeff...
- That's the way it is!
I can count on you?
- Yeah, so, I count on myself...
- Octave, do you love me?
Advertising is not an easy job, and that's also why we're so well-paid.
To shut us up, you won't believe me, but
money isn't the only reason I chose that job.
I was 17 and a half when I had my first "ad-shock."
I knew it was what I wanted to do.
I went to the cinéma; ads were sometimes better than the film.
Some were little treasures of ingenuity.
That day I decided to become an ad designer.
And I succeeded.
Here, on the 14th floor, is my office.
That's Cuddly near the radiator.
A blond hamster picked up on a filming shoot.
And next to it is this dumb teenager.
My man Charlie.
He's mine.
My partner.
He is the artistic director, my D.A.
Or A.D., "Art Director"
As we say in the profession, because it sounds more American.
Hello Thierry, it's Charlie. Hello, sorry to disturb you.
I'm confused about this email I received, the one with the eel...
The moray eel... sorry.
I can't tell, is it a guy or a woman it's fucking with?
I thought it was a guy...
It's bad...
Oh, you're working now...
Like every advertiser in every company in the world, my Charlie spends 89%
of his work time sharing trashy pictures on the internet.
There, he's currently in the great "Japanese vomit eater" period.
- Charlie - Yes, Octave
- If I told you, I have the vague feeling to lose my temper
what would you say?
- Wait, wait, are you telling me this here?
- Yeah I'm telling you.
- Ok then, tell me, I'm listening to you.
- I simply have the vague feeling to lose my temper.
Yeah, of course.
- Alright, I understand you completely, I'd like to tell you many things.
- So come on, come on...
- Did you snort coke with someone else?
- No, I would never do that to you.
- So this is me you...
you are provoking me!
- I said nothing, stop, stop.
Oh yeah insult me in German.
Come on, punish me!
- Guys, we're waiting for you. The set, is ready for the shooting in Boulogne...
- Yeah, we're coming, we're done, we go...
- A masterpiece!
- Has someone told Steven it's an ad for sauerkraut?
- Don't know, I doubt it.
- Please go tell him!
- No you! - No you!
You, it's good... - What a bitch that guy.
- Like that, yes. You detest me, despise me with your mouth...
- Steve... Can I talk to you for just 2 seconds...
Sorry.
It's super good, super glamour, super sensual...
But could you just square me a plan?
Cause I have some suggestions to make it more classic,
More neutral. You see, it's not a lingerie ad...
it's sauerkraut...
- Sauerkraut, that's what you want?
- No, but it's good!
- Turn on the radio!
Move, come on move!
There... Who's that?
- Ooh, it's Jeff. - Hi guys, everything going well?
- Be careful, your drooping piece of fabric...
- Sorry, I don't feel like joking.
Are you ready for "Starlight"?
- That's it! - That's it, I told you earlier.
- No it's me, I told you.
- Ok, ok alright.
I don't want to put pressure on you,
but currently it's super hot with Madone...
- Yeah, Starlight is yet to be straight...
What!? I'll call her back...
You don't seem to realize
-although that's normal, you're artists-
but Madone is 39% of Ross sales, so...
Fuck! I'm gonna spit on your mug!
I told you, I'll see to it later...
Jeff always owns a new rubbish gadget.
For example, his telephone is built into his ear.
The whole thing is permanently linked to his secretary.
- This bitch bugs me. Look, it's my headset.
I'm permanently linked to her, so I always know everything.
It's very expensive and it drives mad.
What I was saying?
The sauerkraut smells like shit, no?
- Jeff, let me introduce you to the guy who makes that sauerkraut.
- Ah yes, Jean-pierre Rannu: Jean-François Marolle,
Jean-François Marolle: Jean-Pierre Rannu.
- Mr. Rannu, really, I'm deeply sorry, but...
You know, we get so stressed with this job, we need to joke...
- Forget it, he's the set manager...
- Beat it!
What Jeff didn't say is that it's the 12th.
On the 15th, he'll receive an evaluation of his work from his client.
That's to say Madone will give him
a sort of school report for an adult.
So he freaks out. It's normal. It's the job.
But it doesn't matter, it's cool.
Moreover, at Ross, everything is cool... Even the sauerkraut.
The Madone executive would kill to be... cool.
It's not easy to tumble into schizophrenic land
when your name is Jean Christian Gagnant and your initials are engraved on your briefcase.
For example, this morning must have been a nightmare for him.
In Madone, every product manager wears short-sleeved shirts...
- Have you received my confirmation e-mail?
...and neckties with little animals on it.
You have received my confirmation mail?
To a product manager, looking cool is very important.
We never forget a client lacks ideas.
And that's why they come to our advertising company.
- It doesn't fit, fuck, fuck and fuck!
Fuuuuuuuck!
In those days, giant pictures were put on the walls,
on bus stops, on trucks, on taxis.
The human eye had never been so solicited in its whole history.
Between birth and 18 years old, we calculated that each person
had been exposed to an average of 350.000 ads.
It took 2.000 years to come to that.
- Octave Parengo. - Hello sir.
- Charles Nagou, we're here for the Starlight meeting.
- Alright, you have an ID card?
- Yes.
- Thanks.
- We're leaving the helmets with you.
- Here are your badges. 1st floor, Veneziano room.
- Thanks.
- You have some...in your left.
Always come late to meetings.
An ad designer on time is not credible.
Entering the room, where everybody's been waiting for him for 45 minutes,
he should by no means apologize.
Upon reflection, it's true that this afternoon meeting
was even more important than an interview with the head of the state.
This meeting changed my life.
I think originally I wanted to make good around me.
It has not been possible for two reasons:
Because I've been prevented, and also a bit because I have given up.
- We're passing through a deep crisis in the yoghurt world.
You know only too well,
since the mad-cow disease case, yoghurt threatens the world.
In this eroding market, our answer is the "Foodament"
the "Foodament" is a food which would also be a medicine.
And then, Starlight innovates and focuses on a white cheese's new vision,
the "bodymading."
with Starlight, I eat smart, so I am smart, so Starlight makes me smart.
That's when we catch them.
It's a bit "head to legs."
The Guy that doesn't laugh at Jeff's "no-joke"
is the one to be convinced. Alfred Dulère, 51 years old.
Scorpio ascendant ram.
Marketing director of Madone's fresh food division.
Suit: Hugo Boss. Perfume: Hugo Boss. Favorite poet: Hugo Boss.
Hasn't touched his wife since since 1993, votes Republican,
loves karting. At Madone and at Ross, he is feared and dreaded.
- Yes, next.
- Which is why in this perspective... of "bodymading"
Octave and Charlie have worked for several weeks...
I'll hand it over to Octave...
- Sorry, I don't know what happened.
I thought the meeting would take place at the company.
Have you received my confirmation e-mail?
- Gagnant, sit down.
- Octave and Charlie, we're listening to you.
- Right, before begining, I'd like to dedicate this film to Tatiana.
I met her in a club two years ago in St. Barths.
Thanks to her.
- Please, a bit of concentration.
Always begin by lightening the mood with a shitty joke.
Drugs help you to gain this nonchalance;
the needed detachment to survive this kind of meeting.
We all want to change the world, and participating in these meetings,
collaborating, I'm aware
being a part of this table means taking part in deadening people's minds.
To succeed, it needed a sacrifice.
But I was doubting of someday being capable of it.
- Octave, you're high.
Octave, you're high.
- Yes... sorry.
- He's on drugs.
- A discovery?
- We're on a beach.
- Yes, so, heavenly beach, coco palms, turquoise sea,
white sand, the Eden-
- Two women.
- Two bombshells.
- Of course.
Are running on the sand.
Long focal length on the young women;
Pamela takes the floor.
In fact, I consider the exegesis of our mastitis are facing cripling hermeneutics.
Christina answers,
Be careful, Pamela. You're slowly slipping into an ontological paronomasia.
- "Not at all, it's just an allegorical solipsism,
nothing to do with it..." Just look.
She bends over the equation.
- I have made an equation for you to understand.
If we accept the hypothesis X cube root
varies according to the infinite... - Ah, ok!
- You just have to subdivide the set
which will tend to the asymptote.
"Exactly, it's good, I've understood!"
They leave laughing.
Packshot: "Starlight: to remain slim except in your head."
- It's good?
- Absolutely.
- Now I ask a question; why make it humorous?
- Yes, in fact we thought it would be interesting...
- No, no, no, I say: why make it humorous?
- Because humor makes the brand friendly,
excellent for the product memorization,
customers remember easier, what makes'em laugh.
- Day after, people at office recall the joke... at dinners-
- No, no, no, why?
- For it, for you, think about comedies that succeed, people going to the cinema.
They sometimes like to have fun, people... No?
- Yes, except they don't eat the reel after.
Alfred Dulère is a big asshole.
Come on, Octave, open your mouth once and for all and shove off.
"Listen to me carefully, dipshit."
"When you go to the dentist, you don't tell him what to do."
"You rely on him."
"Here it's the same: You rely on us!"
- So, you have something else?
We're off our rocker, stop to shoot up, guys. Jeff?
- Yes? - Who do we sell the yoghurt to, fuck?!
- The housewife.
- The housewife, is what? You need to go out, guys!
The housewife is a tired good fellow. She's in her suburb supermarket.
Her kids are bitching in the caddie.
Her hands are full of shit, she's blown-out.
She has all a bunch of problems, her husband boozes.
She doesn't feel like having a headache with ironic references that nobody knows!
So, before thinking about your 4 friends in Paris you'll make laugh,
I'm also a part of, time to time, it makes me laugh, your bullshit.
Before that, you should ask yourself, "what does our housewife want to see?
what does she want to hear? what does she want us to tell her?"
There, that's all! That's the question.
You should stop lying to yourself, now...
- Really nice, your view of the world!
- Me, guys, I have 12.000 tons of yoghurt to sell off this year.
So, make it young - ok. Make it sexy - ok.
And...?
And make people dream!
What the fuck, we're dream sellers!
Yesterday, I went to see my goddaughter, she had her dance show.
Decors were painted by children...
I took off.
My proper joint, Charlie.
So, I was wondering, dance, would there be something to find around dance?
Yoghurt, lightness, feminity, ... A dancer wearing a tutu?
No?
- Yes...
- No, no, we will find, we will... huh guys...
- Still with your style, humor, glamour,...
There, now you know. You now know why you've been watching shitty ads for years.
It's here, at this moment that everything's tied up.
Ad designers don't lack ideas; behind every shitty ad is a good idea
thrown-up in the bin, just because everyone, me included, shit in his pants.
- Excuse-me.
- You alright?
- No, no because I'm leaving Ross.
I'm leaving that pigsty.
I stop working, I get it out of my system,
I stop it all, I piss you off, I despise you all.
I give you my card back.
Of course, it's not a resignation. it's a layoff, of course.
You fire me, classic stuff; indemnities, cash, golden parachute
Big money, ok!?
- What happened to you, Octave?
You've recently changed your drug?
- No, no.
- Ah, I see. You're writing a script on a guy who drives on depression.
Ok, no it's good, but it lacks some...
No it's funny, you're still funny, but I don't know, the guy...
...could lose everything.
He could become shit.
Think about it.
Octave... I love you, you know it.
YOU
Sophie's worked at Ross for 3 years.
She's a part-time planning manager. Marc hired her.
He's always had good taste.
No, no don't insist.
No, sex in the elevator with an intern, is...
Far too, "Adrian Lyne" for me.
Even if I think you're hot as hell.
It's out of question! Negative!
I've got a reputation to preserve, you understand?
Here! It's more in the mood; dirty parking, shabby lights,
very Mike Lee...
We fancy it at this time.
Piss smell, the real one.
What you will do, Sophie? You'll take your lil'scooter in the rain,
pick up your lil' husband, watch the saturday night show?
That's it, the happiness he offers you... That's it?
- I'm single and I don't have TV,
- Ok, wait, wait. I know I'm a superficial and arrogant shit.
Ok, I won't deny it.
But I like you, you understand?
Your hair, your eyebrows, your small intestine pleases me. Even your rebuffs please me
- If my rebuffs please you...
- Nobody, nobody ever pleases me.
I'm sure if you let yourself be kissed, it could be relatively... pleasant.
I knew it. You're really a beautiful slut.
- Wear it, wear it... so I can kiss myself a little!
Everything's alright, everything's alright!
"Hi, it's Sophie. Leave me a message, and I may call you back."
Since Sophie left you, you turn around your flat.
You don't open your curtains anymore.
You only use one room out of nine.
The microwave signals your week-ends.
You order your ready-meals by phone.
Since you're living alone, you jackoff to a lot of video-tapes.
You always have sheets of kleenex taped at your fingertips.
Being without Sophie made you ugly.
Not only drugs cause withdrawal.
It was easier to have a single dumb behaviour
when you knew Sophie was waiting for you.
Since Sophie left you, the world stopped spinning.
When was it again?
- It's going alright, thanks a lot!
- Stop it...
You've finished eating?
- I can't with it... Like I can, with my hand.
- I see that.
- With that, I can't, or otherwise if I pick at it...
You see, if I pick...
- So you've finished now?
- Yes.
- So, I got a little gift for you.
Happy St. Valentine Day.
Ah yeah, it was that day.
- You're unfair. Plus we said no gifts.
- But this, it's a litlle bit more than that.
- What, sorry? Lot more than that?
- Lot more...
- So, it's a surprise
I if I open it,
It won't blow me in the...
Here I go...
It smells like pee a bit.
- It's a pregnancy test.
Positive.
I'm pregnant by you.
- Holy cow! It was hard.
I spilled all my guts, everything that every man
in the world says to their pregnant girl in this moment.
- Sir, Madame Have you finished?
- Yes. Yes, it's over.
- You don't want a little dessert?
Sophie never told anyone she was pregnant,
except to you.
Moreover, at Ross, nobody knew you were together.
What is she doing? Who is she calling?
Where is she when she's not here?
Marc and Sophie, didn't fit together, but they were well together.
Which is lot more unusual.
They go to a luxury hotel,
three times a week, at about 14h15,
In order to have sex in a clean and a central place.
Ouch, you're hurt.
- Guys, fun's over. Joke's over, good mood's over, all is game over.
I am not joking here!
Dulère just called me, he's never talked to me that way!
Listen to me!
If we don't have a new airtight script
by 2 o'clock, we're all dead!
I'm telling you, in one hour, we're all on the dole!
- It's so depressing in here, it looks like 3 Ross employees...
- President, it so kind of you to come see the small workers.
- Hi youngsters!
- Tell me, Jeff, we've been phoned by Dulère: it's not right.
- Jean-François, what stage are you at with Madone?
- Precisely, we're in the middle of a meeting.
We're on a lot more federative concept.
We're at that stage.
- Oh, really, we're at that stage?
- Do we have your green light, Marc?
- Get on it, huh?
- Yes Mr. President, we'll get down on it. Hey that's good...
- Hey, Cuddly isn't punchy...
- Stop it, you idiot, you're gonna kill it.
Stop doing that, it's gonna choke, I tell you.
- Hey, we should already be shooting, now!
And your bullshit!
Fuck, we're done now!
We lose Madone, it's direct layoff...
But you don't give a fuck anyway, you'll always find a job.
At least move your ass for the others!
I'm not even talking about me.
Anyway, I know you despise me, you don't like me.
I'm just a little shitty salesman, is that it?
Think about low wages, the small posts, they will pay the price.
Jacqueline, at the accounting dpt with her handicapped kid,
45 years old, you think she'll find a job?
She can dream on!
...and Momo who cleans your shit up every evening, your coke, your porn mags!
He can also dream on!
Be human, fuck!
Of course, it feels weird to him, realizing he will shortly be homeless.
Jean-François Marolle has been programmed for a meaningless existence.
He has accepted being insulted and humiliated for 15 years
by his employers and his customers, to be able to borrow money from the bank
in order to acquire 3 rooms in Levalois-Perret.
- That's fine, come on. Let's go, uh?
- Ok.
- Come on, it's good, stand up.
He freaks out so much, he would almost become pitable.
- So... the last-minute crap, ok?
- Absolutely.
- The crap...?
- A charming woman.
- Not too old, or too young.
- Neither blonde nor dark.
- Chestnut?
- Dark.
- ... Performs small dance steps, wearing a tutu.
- Ah no, no, no. Vanna White's little shirt.
- I'll take it.
She's on a beautiful seaside house's terrace.
Decorated like in...
- "Friends."
- Warm without being flashy.
She looks into the camera, she exclaims with a voice...
- Suave but authentic...
- "It's pretty, isn't it?"
No, "I'm told I'm pretty..."
"I'm said to be pretty."
- "But I don't ask myself the question."
- "I'm quite simply myself!"
She grabs a Starlight cup and delicately opens it.
- Neither too fast nor too slow.
- Before enjoying a spoonful...
- She closes her eyes with pleasure while enjoying the product.
- That's good, huh?
- In passing, 2 second plan, at least...
- Minimum, uh...
- Then, she looks straight at the camera:
"My secret is..."
- "Starlight!" Yes, yes!
Scuse me...
- Starlight...
- So there you put the product demo...
With 6 white cheeses, fat-free, with calcium, vitamins, proteins,
To be healthy in head and body there's nothing better...
- They will love...
- She resumes;
"Here is my secret."
- "But it's not a secret anymore since I told you all!"
- Impish laugh.
- Not too much...
- Package shot, "Starlight, to stay slim except inside your head."
- It's awesome.
Guys, you blew me away!
- It's in your email.
- Dulère's gonna shit in his pants when he sees this.
- You have no self-esteem. I despise you, beat it.
- They're gonna go mad!
- Run away!
- Uh Charlie, we're gonna bugger Madone once again...
What?! Yeah I'm coming, bitch...
- Go check your email.
You idiot... She's dead.
- I'm a dad, she's pregnant!
- It's not true! It's working, it's true?
- You never thought of being a model?
- I'd rather be a comedian, it's my dream.
I do lots of castings, but there's too many girls.
I heard I'm too "exotic."
- If I hear of stuff one day, would you like me to pull some strings for you?
You know, I'm an important person.
- I'll make you 10% on your blow jobs.
It's true, to a professionnal like Tamara, Octave is a puzzling customer.
He asks her to wear Obsession, Sophie's perfume.
She appeases him.
Tamara is the escort he doesn't fuck.
- Come on.
Wait wait, softly, light, light, cruising.
Respect yourself.
You've got beautiful hair.
- They're extensions.
- You've got beautiful eyes.
- They're contact lenses.
- You've got a beautiful breast.
- It's a Wonderbra.
- You've got beautiful legs.
- Aah, at last a compliment!
- Stop!
Why are you whoring?
Are you unhappy?
- I'm never unhappy When I do...
- To me it's the opposite. I call you not to be unhappy.
It's beautiful.
- You think someday we'll make love?
- Call me back, Sophie. I'm so sorry.
Octave, it's Jeff, I hope you saw my messages on your cellphone.
Anyway your voicemail is full. And I wanted to tell you
I made Tamara come in, the actress you told me about.
By the way, she is terrific. If you can call me back that would be nice.
IT'S THE FIRST AND LAST TIME YOU SEE YOUR DAUGHTER. Sophie
It's 18:00, you can pass at the office.
I hope you don't have any personal issues.
Octave, It's Jeff again. Call me back, I went out to have a run.
I came by your office, I tried to call you on your cellphone.
So, Octave, I've called all Paris clubs, you're not under the tables.
You would be nice to call me back, I hope you have no worries...
- Octave! Fuck! where have you been?
Where have you been? Did you hear my mess...?
- Leave me alone!
I'm on a bad trip.
- Darling, Eric Won the match! - I scored 3 goals!
- Eric has won the match!
There honey, a beautiful chocolate bar, filled with good milk for your growth.
- Hello!
- Have you seen a cute chick passing by, leaving from here? she was in yellow.
- Ah, ah, Eric has won the match! - I scored 3 goals!
- Ok, it's over, you can leave, you can stop, it's all over, you can go back home.
You don't exist!
Look at yourselves, you don't match at all.
Your persona, your hairdos, your white teeth, everything.
The blotch, here; dirt with nothing around it, it doesn't exist.
Nobody gets dirty like that, you understand?
- Eric has won the match!
- Look at your mouths, you're Danish.
You're overdubbed.
You're not synchronized, I am. I've got a microphone, you understand?
- Eric has won the match! - I scored 3 goals!
- What match? Fuckin shit! What match?
What sort of match? Foot, tennis, waterpolo? What...?
The number of birds in here is crazy!
What's your nutrition like?
- A beautiful chocolate bar, filled with good milk
for your growth.
- Could you turn that music off, it's a pain...
- You're walking on carpet This orange juice is fake,
this plate is glued, look, there's a technician here, look.
There are cameras everywhere! Look! Look, go away...
Ah yeah, look! Look!
What's with the tracks here?! we'll fall down!
- Hello girls. - Hello Jeff.
Here, at Ross and Witchcraft, the customer is always right.
And the customer is you.
Stéphanie, give me the call!
Yes, Jean-Christian, how is the little family?
You'll always have the last word.
Yes, I read your proposition, It's really a great idea!
Ah yes, it's terrific. Really, good bye!
See you Wednesday!
Even if it's not your job, we'll make you feel important.
You won't come to us by any chance.
The World is a concept and your concept will be ours.
- It feels good.
For my anus, I use R&W, "smell and flavour", So, with one touch.
I keep my anus and my breath fresh...
- It's charming... relax, try to quiet down, it's gonna be alright.
Try to calm down.
I'm here, I'll be just behind the ambulance...
- He's gonna die! - It's ok, it's ok.
- He's gonna die! - Go away, go away!
- Let him breathe! Here we go.
- Prepare me some adrenaline, - Block, block.
- Charge.
- We're losing him.
Octave is back from the dead.
For him, life without cocaïne is nearly a wonder.
It's a bit like a life without TV to some.
Everything is slower, and it gets boring quickly.
He tells himself, maybe that's the secret that will save the world.
Accepting boredom.
...Not easy...
Jeff never held a grudge toward him for the punch.
Finally, he's nice Jeff.
- He looks fine, uh? - Not really.
- Yes, he looks fine.
Octave and Jeff could die together. It would be good for society.
- Octave, you ok? You look really well today.
It's a pleasure.
- It's a pleasure to see you.
I have something to tell you.
- Well, we'll talk in the car.
- I'll take your bag.
- That guy, Octave's new friend, is Pyjaman.
Marc Maronnier is dead. Octave and everyone
from the agency were shocked by Marc's suicide.
But to say his action surprised them would be a lie.
- I had a feeling it would happen. - I didn't expect it at all.
- I expected it. On a positive note, at Madone they are 100%...
At the agency, with Starlight, everything's going as expected.
The train of mediocrity hasn't run a minute late.
Rather, it even got ahead.
Setting the page of the crap,
presenting at Madone,
appreciating at 200%,
buying of even more broadcasting spaces.
Congratulating.
Calling me a genius.
- Sophie, you have news?
- Definitely. - She went away to Canada.
She resigned.
Marc was fired by the board.
On the beach, at sunset, he put a bullet through his head.
In advertising, when one joins the space above earth,
there are no articles in the papers, no half-mast posters.
No souvenir show.
Unsold stock options are what remains.
When a publicist joins God, he's replaced with a living publicist.
Marc, I'll avenge you.
- Watch out, it's fragile...
Arriving at the PPM.
In America, PPM means Pre-Production Meeting
It's the last meeting where every detail is decided before the shooting.
The meeting of the top.
The one who's just 34 yo and already speaks to herself.
It's Fabienne, the TV producer.
Single, under prozac, she always does her best.
It's tiring her enormously, but so are we.
- Right, before starting the meeting, I'd like us to have a moment
for Marc Maronnier, who left us tragically some days ago.
A thought for the great professional he was, but above all for the man himself.
Concerning Jean Christian's confirmation mail, shooting list precisions.
It was phone contacts for the shooting, everybody agree with it?
- It must be a yoghurt "in the life."
Moreover, the laptop on the table idea for the packshot is perfect. It's modern.
It makes it cash... Giovanni, what does he think about it?
- Giovanni, Mr. Dulère.
That's Giovanni Del Toro, he has been chosen cause he is very pro.
Translation: he bows to the agency.
- If everybody agrees, we can proceed to casting now, Charlie...
Now at this moment, the client must choose the person
who will embody the product. It's always a sensitive point.
- Here are our 2 choices for the Starlight woman.
Jennifer, you can reach at 88-60-90.
We love her, she is fresh, she is modern.
- What's that mess? what's with the black?
Jeff, restrain your guys, cause we're again starting whatever goes.
Excuse me, I'm not racist, but no...
That will only happen if we bring a Starlight Chocolate out.
Why not, but here it's not my fault if our youghurt is white.
Blacks are too alienating.
- It produces too much anxiety.
- I can be open-minded, but there are limits.
- So too much African, not enough French, we agree?
- Too much African, not enough... - African not enough French.
- There, it's better, that's better,
It's even really good.
She is really good that Tarama...
- Tamara - Yes, Trama...
- Superb, she's totally what the brand values.
- It's Madone's proper image.
It's superb.
- It's different? - It's different.
Excuse me, she looks less slutty than the previous one.
- That's right.
- It's completely Starlight.
- It's no more and no less than Jennifer Lopez. Younger, more trendy
- It wouldn't still be too much African?
- You can brighten her face a little, in post-production?
- Completely, we'll rework the tone during the calibration, no problem.
- Ok Bingo! That's her.
- So, we optionalize it.
The meeting lasted 7 hours. 7 hours of jerking-off.
With some show of bravery...
- Gagnant, anything else?
- Eh, yes, important.
- I'd like us to validate the green density of the lawn, now.
Well, in short, it's bootlickin' it's titillating, it's nit-picking,
it's diddling at night, as usual.
And during hours... - Up, up, down,
Right, right, up, up, up,...
To you, the small meeting looks as if it were nothing.
Completely surreal and entertaining.
And yet...
- It's not for you, there will be chocolate, after and before.
- No, a custard tart! - It will be after.
- Chocolate mousse! - Stop it kids, stop it.
That's enough kids!
Pay cheaper, cheaper. It's cheaper for you.
- Validated, perfect!
- I think we were totally focused here. - 7 hour meeting, I think we did a good job.
- I personally really enjoyed myself. - Good, there will be fewer.
- Really, really good meeting, Corinne, I like a lot of your work.
- No, but my name is Fabienne. - Welcome to Ross.
- I've been working here for 5 years.
- Look at this! Octave is already set to go to Miami.
He even has his little bag. Bloody Octave!
- Tamara, it's really good, honestly, come on spit!
There, softly...
- Still respect yourself...
It's really good,
but just a little bit greedier, please.
Offer it to us, give it to me, greedier.
Think about closing your eyes when swallowing, ok?
- Yes.
- One has to feel the pleasure in your throat.
Come on, act it for me,
Right, close you eyes while swallowing.
You take your time.
That was good what you did in the end.
Really good, more smiley at the end than at the start.
That's the product benefit, it makes you fresh, happy and blooming, ok?
We're here, we rule. Of course you keep the interior.
But if you give to the other, you rule, you take, without never...
because otherwise we are unbalanced... But, rise the product up.
There, mysterious, good. Look at the product, look at us.
And offer Starlight!
There, that's it! We'll do it again
- It's really...
- She's good? - Huge, nothing to do...
Don't you think? - Superb
It was the last take of the day.
And the most important for an ad film: the packshot.
Hours of lighting, every minor detail matters; yoghurt choice, the spoon.
In fact, the Everest jerk-off.
- Best thing is to do a balled up on Starlight, I think...
- It's really well done!
- All right - No it's shit and you know it.
You see the two fuckers over there?
- I've always known we could count on him.
- I want to make them cry. After the take,
you hang on to the chief cameraman for 10 minutes.
We'll shoot our version.
Something never done before.
A commando operation.
- With what he puts in his nose, he won't go far...
- He's an artist, that's how it is with artists.
Simple client. We'll find another one.
Octave, I wanted to tell you how much you impressed me.
Thank you, Octave. Thank you for your involvement.
I know this script wasn't your favourite...
You played the game as a great professional.
Obviously, Alfred Dulère is a dickhead even abroad.
- See you soon. - See you very soon.
- So, we've got a plane to catch.
- Yes, didn't you want to salute Tamara?
- oh, yes Tamara... yes, Gagnant! I leave you my house keys.
Details Diana, details!
- Buddy come see, you're ready? - Yes
- You're ready? - Yes
- Wait, wait, they want to promote us to the creative director post.
250.000 F per month, plus expense claims, paid apartment, company porsches,
company bitches, stock options. Well there, that's coke mountain!
- No. - But yes, you must say yes!
- No, no, no. - Why?
- Because I've got something sexier. More revolutionary.
- What's that? - After...
- We shot the package?
No, skip it. This movie is shit.
- But it's important, the packshot! - Later Fabienne, later.
US
We have succeeded.
Our version was done. We were kings, we were the strongest.
Here it is, I had a comeback.
- That's weird, that stuff doesn't go pop off anymore.
- Try again.
- May I serve you anything? Tea, coffee?
Madam, sir, would you like a drink?
I stayed cooped up at home,
crying and incoherently mumbling on Sophie's answering machine.
In the meantime, Charlie, that fuckhead, had already answered the promotion for us both.
I just had to sign the papers.
Visually, Creative Director, initialed D.C.
Young blood at R & W.
- Ahh, you're no dorks! You could have smiled a bit more,
but you are no dorks!
In Ross' name, I raise my glass to our two new Creative Directors:
Octave and Charlie.
Yes Stephanie, wait, speak louder... - Come on.
- What, the police? - Have a drink.
- Well, ok, let them come up, yeah.
The police want to see you. They're coming up.
- Hello? - Hello Octave? This is Mrs. and Mr. Lacase
on the phone, Sophie's parents.
- Oh hi, how are you?
- Inspector Parretti, we've come for Octave Parengo and Charlie.
- We heard your messages on Sophie's cell phone.
And we don't really understand...
Our daughter committed suicide, Octave.
- Wanted for murder.
- It's because of you. She committed suicide in Senegal
with her friend, Marc, you understand?
She put a bullet in her face, Octave. - I understand.
- Actually, can I call you back later?
Because I'm here at a meeting now.
I can't really answer you, I'll call you back on Tuesday.
Ok? Kisses... - Octave, you're fired!
- Now it's too late, it had to be done earlier, I'm sorry...
- That boy is a real shit.
- what are you doing here? - I quit my life, by myself!
- Get him! He's buggering off!
- Wait, it's ok, it's ok. - Get him!
- It's alright.
- I've an idea, I'm gonna...
- You stay here!
- It's locked!
- Tamara, it's Alfred. Alfred Dulère.
Tell me, would you fancy a small dinner at the silver tower,
one of these evenings? And I have a little surprise for you.
- Put your gun away!
- Parengo, don't mess up!
Come back, Parengo! Don't do it, I'm telling you!
Give me your hand, stop that!
Everything is temporary. Love, art, planet Earth.
You, me.
Particulary me.
PROJECTION TEST You're part of a pre-test panel.
TO BE CONTINUED: OPTION END N°2 (Thank you for indicating your choices at the room exit)
- Octave, fuck, I am in a mid-bad trip. Enormous... I'm not fine at all.
- Yes good evening. Do you want champagne? Amuse la bouche?
- Thanks, madam.
- I didn't come here to die with you.
There's a little girl waiting for me in Morocco, everything I do is for her.
- What's this?
- Vomit, you both swallowed that shit together.
- You puked on yourselves
- Fuck, Octave, I thought we had killed people.
I thought we were pursued by the cops, I was so scared, no joke...
- Me too. - Come here.
At this instant, we were beautiful inside but pitiful outside...
- Stop laughing, fuck!
Deep inside us, very deeply, it was a new birth.
The universe was offering us a second chance.
- Thank you. - And there are your baggages...
- No, that's fine, I'll take it, thank you.
Dulère had to be blasted, then I had to disappear, very quickly.
To help me realease the commercial, I contacted the AAF guys.
The Anti-Ads Front, a secret activist small group Charlie dug out on internet.
- You behave, exactly like them, here... Watch out, Seb...
- Like them, why?
- Excuse me for telling you that, but you're doing verbal marketing here.
- Wait, I'm doing verbal marketing?! You know what you're sayin here?
- A terrorist attack should be tried.
Like Hud, he had got a good job at the Channel 1 Ad section.
It's him who broadcasted the film on live...
Here it is, Octave is dead, and so is his car.
But I couldn't leave this world without savouring my victory.
- Excuse me, president...
Yes? Well, ok, of course...
Can you turn on the television to channel 1?
- My pleasure, mister.
- It's good, we're watching. - Here it is, thank you.
It will be awesome, director!
We'll rip it up!
The tests are super positive, I think we can say it.
- Yes my dear. - Finally, they're friendly.
And we strong things live.
- Look my dear, I think it's going to begin.
- Sorry, I feel stupid, I'll do it again. - Hello! This is Starlight.
A new diet yoghurt, that's strictly without any relevance.
So why are we trying to sell it to you?
Because we've got goals, we have numbers to meet.
What did you think? You think we're having fun here?
- You know how much it costs for 30 seconds of people's brains
who are watching tv at this hour? 400.000 F.
So how do we do? With what do we pay this?
And our executives, how do we pay them?
Wait, our CEO for example, whose salary is nearly the amount of
Burkina Faso's gross domestic product, eh?
What do we pay him with? Where do we find the cash?
And our shareholders? The investors?
How do we do it? How do we? How do we?
- Fuck that's disgusting!
So now, turn your lil' tv off, take your lil' coin holder,
and go directly to the supermarket to sell off stocks.
12.000 tons to gobble up!
Madone, buy it. Otherwise it won't sell.
Who's slim in his head?
- Anyway, now we can't say you give your customers shit...
I was savouring my revolution, I was disappearing... far.
Learn to live differently.
My friend Pyjaman told me about the jungle.
Each year, the world-wide budget
spent on advertising came out to be 500 billion dollars.
A UN study estimated that only 10% of that ammount
would be necessary to reduce world hunger by half.